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A few months late... (Reply to this comment)
by Penguinlady
I just read this review. I haven't seen this movie, and probably won't, but your words are very powerful.
I recall a case in a fishing town in Conn. a few years ago - New Bedford? Mystic? - in which a young Portuguese (read: lower social class) woman was gang raped on a pool table in a bar while the rest of the clientele stood around drinking and cheering. It made national headlines, but I don't remember if that was before or after this film came out.
Margaret
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Feb 05 '04
5:04 pm PST
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Sorry I am Late to Rate (Reply to this comment)
by Granniemose
I saw this movie some time ago - it was powerful.
It is dreadful when it happens to someone like the character Jodie portraid, but it is worse when it happens to someone who is innocently minding their own business.
I do know that sometimes innocent people are accused of rape when there is no way in the world they could have done it. There are some women who cry rape just as a way to get revenge, or get money - or sometimes even publicity. It is a mixed bag - and if anyone is guilty - and if it can be proven without a doubt, they should be punished to the limit of the law.
Virginia
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Nov 04 '03
7:48 pm PST
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Re: Corrected rating :) (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Andrew,
You're just too cute. Thank you.
Marsha :)
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Oct 24 '03
11:41 pm PDT
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Corrected rating :) (Reply to this comment)
by bob_tomato
now that I've figured out how it's done - this review is now correctly rated Most Helpful...
:) Andrew
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Oct 23 '03
5:19 am PDT
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Re: Re: Re: Re: No is No, but . . . (Reply to this comment)
by ed_grover
Marsha: I blame the designers, too. I was in the fashion business for so long and there were always wonderful clothes to see. There still are, but some of these things I see these days that are literally falling off the body or are all raggedy (deconstructed they call it) make me cringe. I wanted to add that I don't care for men who dress outrageously either. I guess it all does come down to get some good taste.
Ed
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Oct 11 '03
6:59 am PDT
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Re: Re: Re: No is No, but . . . (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
I have a problem with the wh*re look that seems to be in vogue now, too, Ed. I never think of rape when I look at them, though, I just think of calling the fashion police! And then they gripe when they're not taken seriously. Grow up and find some taste!!
But in real life, I don't know anyone who actually dresses like that. I guess that look is expensive. :)
Anyway, you're welcome for my response, I'm glad it made you think. Yours made me think, too. As for Kobe, we're being inundated with all sorts of information. Which of it is true, and which of it isn't is anyone's guess. I haven't heard the sneaking in for an autograph story. All the stories I've heard said she gave his whole entourage a tour. When they got to Kobe's room, his bodyguards left the two of them alone, and Kobe invited her in. What happened after that will be left to the justice system, I guess.
I don't like judging the accuser in this case, nor do I like judging Kobe. I haven't seen the evidence. So I'll hold off until then.
Take care, my friend,
Marsha
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Oct 10 '03
8:01 pm PDT
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Re: Re: No is No, but . . . (Reply to this comment)
by ed_grover
Marsha: Your fine reply made me think a bit and I'm sure you're right on all counts. I can think back to a time when I said "no" sometime in the late 1950s and my (then) lover wouldn't hear of it. It wasn't pleasant. I just have a problem with young women . . . or any women dressing like J-lo or Brittany or even Lil' Kim and expecting to be treated like a lady. As for the Kobe accuser . . . she snuck into his room to ask for an autograph? Now really, that's a bit rich for me and I bet some others, too.
As for the nut cases who are out raping little old ladies, I'm not surprised when I see the mug shots. And, these are generally the same kind of inbred kooks who do all F*g bashing and other hate crimes, too. I suppose I better shut up while I'm ahead, but I appreciated your response.
Ed
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Oct 10 '03
2:59 pm PDT
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Re: Re: Re: Wow! (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Oh you poor thing! :) That must have a great date! I'm sure the movie must have been right up his alley then???
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Oct 08 '03
7:56 pm PDT
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Re: Re: Wow! (Reply to this comment)
by chilliebrady
not well. he had a fear of happiness. (not joking!)
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Oct 08 '03
6:56 pm PDT
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Re: Re: You are right (Reply to this comment)
by AliventiAsylum,  in Movies
Was that the high school football hazing that was all over the national news? Just curious.
Probably. We get an update pretty much every day around these parts, so I don't know if it made national news, but since I haven't heard of any others... High school kids at a camp in PA...
Patti
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Oct 06 '03
3:49 pm PDT
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Re: You Are So Gifted! (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
But if I did this for a living, I wouldn't get to hear from people like you now, would I? :)
Thank you so much, and yes, you must see it. Let me know if you do!
And bless your sweet heart, Deb...
Marsha
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Oct 04 '03
8:05 pm PDT
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You Are So Gifted! (Reply to this comment)
by ruby950
Marsh~
I haven't seen this movie.........now I know that I must! What a review! You really need to do this for a living, not the mere pittance here.
Wow, Wow, Wow!
Deborah~
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Oct 04 '03
11:42 am PDT
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Re: Wow! (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Toni,
Oh my God, no, I cannot imagine this as a first date movie!!!! You poor thing! How did it turn out, by the way? :)
Thanks for your kind words, and it's always good to hear from you.
Marsha
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Oct 03 '03
10:49 pm PDT
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Wow! (Reply to this comment)
by chilliebrady
Hi Marsha,
What a terrific review! I really enjoyed reading it. I've seen this movie several times and am always impressed by Foster's acting. I was in my first year of college when this came out, and I actually saw this on a FIRST DATE with someone. Can you believe that? Talk about a heavy first date????
Anyway, truly great review!
Toni ;)
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Oct 03 '03
6:56 pm PDT
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Re: This review is too good for my typical "comment title"... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Tim,
Now there you go making me blush again! Goddess? Damn! The other day at Disney World, Di called me a Queen, and now I'm a goddess... Never in my wildest dreams have I aspired to royalty. Perhaps I should throw my hat into the California race for Governor?? :)
As far as the rape issue goes, temptation or no temptation, the act is wrong...and cheering it on? That's almost as disturbing as the act itself.
Once you see this movie, you'll feel that a thousand times more strongly. One man in particular ought to push your hate button beyond its limits.
I do hope you see this, Tim. I think you will "like" it a lot (that's an odd word to use with this film, but you know what I mean). Let me know what you think, okay?
I hope this finds you well, sweetie.
Thank you so much for your constant support, and all of the beautiful things you say. They just mean the world to me.
Big hugs and kisses,
Marsha
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Oct 02 '03
7:50 pm PDT
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Re: Re: Let's see... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Barbara,
Thank you so much. Your words mean a lot to me.
Marsha
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Oct 02 '03
7:44 pm PDT
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Re: Let's see... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Nedi,
Now let's see, where do I start? :)
Thank you for all of your kind words, first of all. I give a lot of credit to the movie, though, for giving me something so powerful to write about.
It's great to be so deeply affected by a film, isn't it? Although in your case, I think it was that "personal vein" you talked about.
When you brought up Knot's Landing, and the comment they made about "admitting" to being raped, you also said, "Why do people admit they were raped? That conversation has stuck with me... and it's amazing how often you do hear that phrase. Sad, don't you think?
Yes, I do. And what I find even more chilling is the amount of women on Epinions alone who have either been sexually abused as children, or raped later in life. Just on this site, I'll bet the numbers are staggering. That's scary.
And I don't know what happened to you, but I know when you're ready to talk about it, you will.
I always look forward to your comments, Nedi, and thank you so much for leaving me such a heartfelt one on this review in particular.
You're very special.
Always,
Marsha
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Oct 02 '03
7:43 pm PDT
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Re: she said...he said... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Andrew,
Thank you for your wonderful words. I'm picturing that large crowd, but are you sure they're a nice crowd? Maybe I'm thinking "tomatoes" because of your moniker...
Anyway, I loved your three cents about Kobe Bryant as well. I especially loved the last two lines: "She said 'I do'. He said 'I don't care.'"
Great commentary. And thank you for stopping by.
Marsha
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Oct 02 '03
11:07 am PDT
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This review is too good for my typical "comment title"... (Reply to this comment)
by flamepillar
You have completely leveled this place with your review. Marsha, you are a GODDESS and there's no disputing it any longer.
As far as the rape issue goes, temptation or no temptation, the act is wrong... and cheering it on? That's almost as disturbing as the act itself. You think about all the mothers of these guys... so much effort they put into trying to raise an upstanding young man and what do they get in return? It's a complete shame.
I don't recall seeing this entire movie, but I do remember something about a girl getting raped on a pinball machine. I don't remember where I saw it, but I can't believe there was ever a time in my life that I could've seen it and not wanted to find out what it was and see the whole thing. Anyways, this will definitely be my next DVD.
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Oct 02 '03
6:54 am PDT
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Re: Let's see... (Reply to this comment)
by ifif1938
There's really nothing more I can add to all the comments about this movie and your review, only that I wish I too had that most helpful button..
Fantastic and such an insightful review!
Barbara
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Oct 01 '03
7:36 am PDT
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Let's see... (Reply to this comment)
by nedipooh
Where do I start? First of all, I wanna say that I've enjoyed your reviews in the past and I absolutely adore the comments you've made. When I see your name pop up, I know I'm gonna smile. This review, girl, has simply blown me away.
I had contemplated trying to write a review on it myself because the film touched me so deeply. But I honestly didn't believe a review could ever do it justice. Well, you did it...and in a way I could only dream of.
One of the most revealing scripts I ever heard about this horrid topic was on a soap opera, believe it or not. My favorite, good ol Knots Landing. It was involving a spousal rape, and it had me in tears, because it hit a personal vein with me that I won't elaborate on...at least not for a while. Anywayyy....I can't remember the exact words, but the woman was trying to explain her feelings....and she began with "I admit I was raped"....pauses...and says "why did I say that.."admit"...like I had done something wrong. Why do people "admit" they were raped?"....
That conversation has stuck with me...and it's amazing how often you do hear that phrase. Sad, don't you think?
Ack! I didn't mean to write a novel here. This was one of the best reviews I've read since I first joined this site, girl. Lordy, if only I had access to that Most Helpful button. I'm really impressed. Wonderful job...
~~Nedi~~
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Sep 30 '03
4:08 pm PDT
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she said...he said... (Reply to this comment)
by bob_tomato
Marsha - this is a hall of fame nominee in my book. (please picture a large crowd showering you with applause here)
Andrew (now for my three cents worth)
-----
I'm sure that we have all heard and participated in endless discussions about Kobe and whether he did or didn't commit rape, about whether "she" tacitly agreed to it by coming to his room or allowing him to go as far as he did, and all the other details of that night. What I find to be disturbingly missing from these discussions is a very real violation, a tragic humiliation. Ultimately, Kobe did commit rape that evening - the raping of his relationship with his wife. She was not present that night to say "no" to Kobe, she was not there to plead for him to remain faithful to his vows, she was_not_there. And this shows what she was worth to Kobe - she was not there, but "she" was, and so "she" was all that mattered to him.
How special, then, she must feel to be pressured to sit in quiet support of this man, to endure the glare of lights and shouted questions. How special, then, that brand new diamond adorning her hand, where once he placed another with promises and kisses, now discarded, trampled and abused.
she said "I do"
he said "I don't care"
How special...
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Sep 30 '03
12:14 pm PDT
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Re: (searches frantically for MH button to no avail) (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Shilo,
Love your subject line! As I just told Tom, though, what you said here is far more meaningful, and I know you hit that button in your mind, so it's okay. :)
Thank you.
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
10:07 pm PDT
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Re: hey there again... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Tom,
But I really loved your first comment! :) Really, it was great. I'm glad you came back though.
I'm touched that you wanted to use your "Most Helpful" button, but what you said here was far more meaningful. I don't know how I've missed you, but I've got you on my e-mail alert list now.
Thanks for making me smile!
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
10:05 pm PDT
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Re: Wow. (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Brian,
You're right. Unfortunately, some women do cry rape when it wasn't. Which is why it's so important to bring the real stories and cases to people's attention. If we don't, we assume the worst about the victim. (I think we do that anyway, just because it's easier, don't you?)
As far as women sending conflicting signals, that was certainly the case here, which is why I had a problem with it. She said "no," though. So no matter what signal was sent, or how it was interpreted, every person alive has a right to change their mind, even if they're nearing penetration.
I think more men should see this movie, especially young men. Things go on at colleges that I'm sure are not reported, and that's scary to even think about.
Anyway, thank you, Brian, and I'm glad you hung in there with me, I know the review was long!
My best right back atcha, :)
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
10:02 pm PDT
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Re: beautifully stated (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Hey, you're welcome! Thanks for stopping!
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
9:54 pm PDT
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Re: Wow. (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Mike,
You should see this. I think it would haunt you greatly. (Not that I want you haunted! But I think you know what I mean.) The more men that see it the better.
I'm amazed that this film was shown in a middle school. Brave teachers and administration, I guess. It probably scared the crap out of all those kids.
Thank you for your wonderful words, they mean more than you know.
Just out of curiosity, what do you think the chances are of something like this getting released today?
I don't know. I thought a lot about that. I think with Jodie Foster behind it, and maybe some other big names stepping up to produce it, it would probably get released. I'd be more curious about whether people's reactions would be the same as they were back then, as compared to now. We are so much more cynical.
Anyway, thank you for touching my heart with your words, and making me all fuzzy inside. :)
If you see the film, let me know, okay?
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
9:53 pm PDT
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Re: A spectacularly angry review of an anger-inducing film (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Patrick,
God, I so agree with you about rape being an assault, and having nothing to do with lust. If it had to do with lust, why do old women get raped in their homes every day? It's certainly not about what they were wearing.
A serial rapist was released into the community without public knowledge because he was not deemed a risk, despite his past.
I believe that rapists are like pedophiles. They can't cured no matter what. It's terrifying to think about.
His victims will probably be scarred for life due to a simple act of negligence.
And then all the lawsuits will be filed, and some heads will probably roll, but no one will be able to give these women their lives back.
Thanks for the thoughtful comment, Patrick. All we can do is try to keep the dialogue flowing about situations like this, and keep putting it in people's faces.
Thanks again,
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
9:45 pm PDT
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Re: "Damn" indeed (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Didn't you love Tom's comment? "Wow. Damn." I think I'm going to leave that on some of your reviews from now on! It says so much with so few words.
I think it was Jodie's finest performance, too. Why do you think she thought it might negatively affect her career? Just the subject matter? Just curious.
She did put it all on the line. In fact, during the rape scene, one of the actors that was "raping" her actually started to cry. I can't remember which one, but I was really moved by that.
As far as Kelly McGillis, I thought she was right for this. She has a detached "aura" about her, kind of like Sigourney Weaver, and I thought that worked in her favor here. And I think if they had brought in someone along the lines of Glenn Close (someone who is up there with Foster, in my opinion), it would have taken the focus off of Sarah. It was her story, and therefore Jodie's movie.
Some of the scenes that touched me the most were the ones between Jodie and Kelly. When they were waiting on a verdict, and Sarah was asking to do Kathryn's astrological chart, when Sarah had to go out and apologize to Kathryn for not telling her a certain something, and when Kathryn sat in the hospital room looking at Sarah's face. I loved all of those scenes, and I thought the dynamic was perfect.
You really put your gut into this piece and it shows. Some movies need a passionate voice to do them justice, and you provide that.
Well, I know I usually pay you $20 per positive comment, but I think I'll have to throw in an extra $10 for that one. And you quoted what I wrote for you word for word. Thank you. You did great!
I am humbled by your words, and incredibly touched as well. You have moved me so often with your words, I guess I owed you one!!
Thank you.
Marsha
I'll slip the check under your back door. Could you just not cash until the 15th of the month? I'd appreciate it.
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Sep 29 '03
9:39 pm PDT
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Re: ... (Reply to this comment)
by katmar
Nate,
Let me know what you think. I don't think you'll be sorry.
Thanks for stopping, buddy.
Marsha
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Sep 29 '03
9:22 pm PDT
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